Somewhere Between Dreams & Reality

 Being in my mid-thirties, I look at my life now and realize that the life I have now is very close to the life I had imagined when I was young. There may be some slight differences, but yeah, I'm living the life I used to dream about.

With social media being such a huge part of our lives now, I often see old classmates and acquaintances and find myself wondering: are they living the life they once imagined for themselves?

I don’t know about you, but society has definitely shaped a certain picture in my mind of what life is “supposed” to look like — finish college, get a job, get married, have kids. But did we all really dream of that same life?

Maybe some people knew from a young age that they never wanted to get married or have children. Maybe others want kids but not marriage, or marriage without kids. My brother, for example, has always known he doesn’t want children.

I know people around my age who got married and are now separated, and somehow it affects me more than it probably should. Maybe it’s the empath in me, but no one enters a marriage expecting it to end.

On the other hand, many people on my feed are still single, and maybe not all of them even have the freedom to move out of their parents’ home. Some may not be able to afford it, while others are held back by the toxic Filipino tradition of staying, even when it no longer serves them.

Sometimes I wonder if we’re truly living the lives we wanted, or simply the lives we were taught to want.

Thankfully, even though I may seem “career-less” in the eyes of others, and even though being a full-time mom challenges me mentally and physically every single day, I can honestly and sincerely say that I am happy. This is the life I once imagined for myself.

I imagined having a husband who is caring, generous, understanding, and sweet — and I have him. I imagined having children who would fight over my love and attention — and I have them. I imagined myself cooking and cleaning for my family, creating a home filled with love. And although I never imagined it would be this tiring, I really am happy.

Hey, just the fact that I married my high school crush despite the obstacles is a dream.

My life now revolves around my little family.  And while there are days when I feel lost and miss having time for myself, my love for them will always be greater. I will gladly offer my days to them — to care for them, guide them, and be present as they grow. I will enjoy every season of watching them become who they are meant to be, until the time comes when they can finally stand on their own feet.

Taal Eruption, 2020

My friend and I drove to Tagaytay last January 12 to attend a friend's wedding the next day. We were actually pretty excited at first because who doesn't get excited at weddings?!

2019 Highlights

Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm all about our wedding. But answer this, if you were in my shoes, wouldn't you be?

Sensitivity At Its Best

Some say I'm too sensitive, but truth is, I just feel too much. Every word, every action, every energy goes straight to my heart.

Yes, straight to my heart. When it comes to relationships, and I mean all sorts of relationships - not just the boyfriend-girlfriend type of relationship - I can really say that I am highly sensitive. That quote hit me real hard because I have come to realize that yes, everything the people I love do or say really go straight to my heart and that's why my heart often breaks.

I don't remember the last time I have been this emotional and I must say, I'm not enjoying it. I keep on telling myself that I'm being over sensitive about things but I can't help it. I try my hardest to put logic on my feelings but I simply can't... it seems as if my emotions are actually eating up every inch of logical explanation that tries to interfere with them. My God, I just wanna get this over with.

"Sometimes, it's better to keep silent
than tell others what you feel
because it hurts badly when you come to know
that they can hear you,
but cannot understand."

Personal: Bienvenido, 2015!

© Tina Cembrano

Don't you just love it when you get to end a year and start a new year with the people you love the most? 

I spent New Year's Eve with my family here at our humble home. Rab, a very special person in my life, came over to celebrate with us as well. We had a simple celebration unlike the previous years. Prior to midnight, I was already outside waiting for pretty fireworks until it rained. Why did it have to rain on NYE? Oh well, I think it's also for our benefit since it wasn't that smokey after all the fireworks. I just want to say that most of my fireworks shots were ruined because of the rain so there were a few left worth sharing.

After screaming and kissing and greeting each other Happy New Year, my family and I bonded over a few drinks and a good conversation at our lanai. Every time I was quiet, I was thinking of how the previous year's been and I can't help but be grateful for all the things that I've earned and lost. I am nothing but with gratitude. To be honest, I wouldn't have it any other way. 

So looking back, how would I really sum up my 2014?

The year started off really well most especially because my beloved best friend from Dubai and a really good pal from America visited the Philippines. I had four hairstyles last year which was surprising. I quit a job I thought I loved, started a mini business (food cart; which is not on the run now), started to focus again on photo gigs, and pretty much gave more time and love to myself. The ups and downs of my 2014 would probably be my favorite so far, since the reasons behind the downs were clearly defined by the ups. Now that 2015 is here, my mind, my spirit, and my heart is ready. I am ready.

Here are a few more snapshots from my NYE ♥

5 Things I Don't Regret

© Photo from Google; post processed at Photoshop

Most people I come across recently have the "awww" expressions on their faces whenever they ask about the ex. I mean, people, why? 

Most people would say two things: I've wasted my six years, or I wasted my 6-year relationship. Yes people, I get it. I understand where you are all coming from. But let me show you things on my perspective.

1. I don't regret being in a long-term relationship with the wrong person

© tumblr

Never regret anything because at one time, it was exactly what you wanted.

 Yes, and why would I regret something I know would teach me all the lessons I need to learn? The things I learned throughout the relationship are things I won't read on any book, no friend could ever tell, and no parent could ever teach. Experience is always the best teacher and I wouldn't be who I am now if it wasn't for all those things. I came to realize that my past relationships had to happen so I could prepare myself to be the best girlfriend, fiance, and wife to the right guy.

2. I don't regret being immature at point in time

© Photo from Google; post processed at Photoshop

Lol. First of all, we were all immature once. With regards to my previous post, yes, I was the girlfriend who would let the boyfriend go on a night out and piss him off. There were even a lot of nights where I wouldn't let him go - which would lead to sneaking out. In other words, lies. 

Along with the immaturity of not understanding that we were 18 and in college, I got jealous of every single girl he meets. I know, why? I don't know. Maybe because I didn't know them at first and just like any other teenage girlfriend, I had this stupid thought in my head where all other girls want my (ex) boyfriend. 

3. I don't regret going back even after being cheated on

© Photo from tumblr; post processed at Photoshop

Yes, there was infidelity involved. It was painful, I'm telling you. It hit my self-esteem so bad. It made me question my worth. It made me question myself. Giving the relationship one more chance was a very tough call for me given that my family and friends were against it. Well, in the name of whatever, I gave it a go. To be honest, the first few months were okay, but we were only human. It wasn't all that magical. As time passed, I thought I had gained back my self-esteem and worth. Well, I was wrong.

4. I don't regret trusting my instincts

© Photo from tumblr; post processed at Photoshop

In relation to my second I-don't-regret entry, I think my instincts were one of the most helpful things in the world. I always felt there was something wrong somewhere. Maybe it took me awhile to listen to my instincts, but they were always right. I don't regret the nights we would fight about something I just felt but don't really have proof. I don't regret hating a girl I don't know and after a few weeks, months, even years, would turn out to be a third party.

5. I don't regret having my heart broken

Breakups are never easy. Whether you're serious or just playing, it's never easy. In a player's point of view, it's hard to breakup with your partner especially if you know s/he is attached to you. In a serious relationship, it's hard to handle breakups especially if you've given your whole self - your thoughts, your past, your everything. But not having to go through a breakup, in my opinion, would be very sad because you wouldn't know the feeling of leaving a person or being left by a person. That sounds absurd, I know. Why would you want to know that feeling in the first place?

Letting people into my life has always been easy. I am generally a nice & friendly person. I'm pretty confident to say that I welcome friendship as soon as I meet somebody I know I have similarities with. Removing people off my life on the other hand is a very difficult thing for me. I'm not the type of person who could easily just say, "okay, you're out. Leave me alone". Nope, that just ain't me. Before I let go of you, I would ask myself again and again if I could still fight for a space for you in my life. When I have come to the point where even the smallest space to be given to you would be choking my life, then you're good to go.

I am happy I have experienced losing a person I spent a big part of my life with. I'm not making it sound like it's an easy thing to go through, but I want to say that it opened my eyes to the reality that it is inevitable to lose someone but that it is also inevitable to get back up, be happy, and move on. It's very easy to say, "I wish it didn't happen", but I'm glad it did. 

Having dated other people, I've grown more cautious of the things that should and shouldn't happen in a relationship. Opening up to another person was a little bit challenging for me, but finding that person who does not disregard my past but understands more than I can ever imagine is definitely what I need.

Experiencing these things first hand, I know now what I want for myself and my future relationship. My understanding for the needs of my boyfriend/husband has broadened and I'm praying that I become a better girlfriend in the future. I have come to understand the need for a "holiday" so I could have time for myself, my family, and my friends, while he could also have the time for himself. I would usually think that having time apart could lead into cheating... but then again, not all men are the same. I know, and I have faith that there is someone who can and will love me faithfully; and most of all, treat me the way I know I deserve.

Thoughts: Matters In Question

When it comes to dating and being in a relationship, there are a lot of issues that both men and women encounter and it's obviously just part of it. Sometimes, it's even hard to distinguish who is right or wrong in an argument/fight. What are the normal issues that couples encounter?

Well, I'm no relationship expert. I don't know. But I decided to write an entry about the shallow issues that couples go through.

MEN's Issues

1. Monthly menstruation 

Menstruation is the periodic discharge of blood and mucosal tissue from the inner lining of the uterus through the vagina. This cyclic discharge is seen in females of certain mammalian species (including humans). It begins with the onset of menarche at or before sexual maturity and stops at or near menopause (commonly considered the end of a female's productive life). The periodicity of menstruation gives rise to commonly used euphemisms such as "period" and "monthly".

Most men, if not all, have issues with their girl's monthly period. I know, it's annoying. I know, I've been there. Lol! It's really hard to explain to guys how painful, annoying, irritating and hard it is to have menstruation since, well, they don't have a uterus and don't have a vagina (don't worry, we know you have balls. But you don't get kicked in the nuts monthly, so this argument is invalid).

To make life easier, maybe guys should just imagine how hard, annoying, awkward, and irritating it is when there's blood flowing out a girl's vagina all day long. It's like peeing all day, but with an enormous amount of pain. I've got 3 tips for you guys:

• Be patient. A girl, no matter how "mature" she can be, is extra sensitive during her period. 
• Be understanding. A girl can suddenly act like she has all the problems in the world but in reality, she's doing just fine. It's just the hormones; deal with it.
• Give her food. There is a huge chance her appetite will grow before and during her period, so just give her an ice cream bucket. 

2. Insecurity: Other women (models, porn stars, celebrities, and most importantly, the EX)

© Google Images

I recently found out about how a girl could react to their guys checking out other women on Facebook, Instagram, Google and the likes. Stalking the ex is a different story.

Boys, you can't really blame us. If we ever catch you looking at pages with images of sexy, beautiful and perfect women, we will really lose our minds. These women: models, porn stars, and celebrities are perfect. They're not even human. They have the most beautiful eyes, long and straight legs, perfect hair, big boobs, small waists, huge ass, flat stomach with abs, and the perfect skin. Knowing that a guy is looking at such images (which is perfectly normal, I get it) is somehow an insult to most girls since normal human beings (such as myself) are flawed. We have huge arms, cellulites, big bellies, the list could just go on and on. We know we can never be that girl. It makes us feel like you look at these girls because of our imperfections.

Now, the ex. Well, a girl's mind is a very complicated mind. We know that things are over between you and your ex, but we still get jealous over them probably because of the fact that at one point in time, you liked/loved them. Again, why? Because we are insecure. We ask ourselves a lot of questions. "Is she prettier than me?", "Was she good in bed?", "Did his parents like her?" -- those things. 

My advice to men:

Just let her win the argument. Tell her what she wants to hear, but remain honest. As for the ex issue, remind her that if your ex was better, then you should have stayed with her instead. Give her the assurance that everything is over between you and your ex.

3. A girl's inability to honestly say what she feels.

This can be of different things: where to eat, to attend a party or not, answer the question "are you mad", or even allowing their boyfriends to go out. Girls, get your shit together. If you want your boyfriend to be honest with his feelings, you better do the same.

I've heard a lot of stories about this and it's really funny how deciding where to eat has become an issue to some couples. Girls, especially those who are pregnant or on their periods are fickle-minded when it comes to what they want to eat and it becomes really annoying for the guys...especially when hungry. As for the going out part, I remember allowing my ex to go to a bar with his friends and actually just piss him off the whole night. I don't know why I did it, but I know it's super ridiculous. I guess I should have just slept through the night or have kept myself busy with something.

Women's Issues

1. Video/Computer Games

Okay, so I've been here. I know how annoying it is to have to wait for your boyfriend to finish a video game. Then maturity hit.

Girls, we are all familiar with the line "boys and their toys". Just let them be. If you want to win the Best Girlfriend Award, let him play with his friends. Consider this as your spa or shopping date with your girlfriends. Boys need their time alone with their games. I don't know, but I think it gives them pride. If you're that cool, try to learn the game and play it with him. Don't suck at it though, you'll give him a headache if you suck.

© Photospin

2. BNO: Boys' Night Out

Okay, so I am also guilty of this. I wasn't a perfect girlfriend. But then I came to realize that not only does he need it, but that I also need it.

You have your girlfriends and he has his friends. If you need alone time with your girls - go on a spa, shopping, lunch out, tea time, salon day, sleepovers, or movie dates, he needs his time with his friends too. Don't take that away from him. 

The thing is, I think most girls have a hard time letting their guys go out because BNOs usually include alcohol. They may go out to bars or clubs and hang out with moderate to huge amount of alcohol and this is when a girl starts to have ludicrous thoughts. I guess most girls cannot move on from the fact that there is a bigger chance the guy will cheat when he's out wit his friends. Why? Let's say there's a group of 5 guys out in a bar. 3 of them are in a relationship, and 2 are single. The 2 single men might like someone from another table, and ask their friends to help them or start a small talk with the girls on the other table. Being "friends", of course they'll talk to the girls too. Then the 2 single men could tease the 3 other guys. I think it gives a guy some sort of pride to know that there is another girl interested in them. I think it makes them feel handsome. Most girls are afraid to trust because of many reasons. They have probably been cheated on before, or their girlfriend has gone through a bad relationship wherein her ex slept with the whole of Makati. You don't know.

As time has passed, especially at the present, I have come to understand how a couple still need time alone. I also learned that not all men have the tendency to cheat. Yes, guys can be one hell of a flirt when they're single, but once they find that girl, they become well behaved. Ladies, if your guy wants to go out with his friends, I think it's better if you let him go without a fight and mean it when you say "have fun" because it will make your men love you even more and feel like they're lucky to have someone who understands his needs. With this, you will also spare yourself of the lies they could actually commit if you become too controlling. 

3. Indifference

Just like our periods, we know that there are days when a guy simply acts indifferent. I'm not saying that they are indeed indifferent, but there are really days where a guy is "not in the mood" to show much affection to their girls or they simply fail to notice a girl's effort to make them smile.

One of the most common "indifferent" issues is how a girl goes to the salon, has her hair and nails done, shop for a new dress to wear for their monthsary date, and a guy fails to notice it, or say something about it. Guys who are reprimanded of this would usually tell their girls that they like their girlfriends more without makeup. Then again, explain why you keep on looking at those perfect girls on the internet. You can't blame a girl for putting up too much makeup for a date when your definition of beautiful and hot is Bar Refaeli or Megan Fox or Sasha Gray. We just really want to impress you.

Men and women of the Earth, we all have issues. Those issues I've written above aren't everything and may not be applicable to you, but they are to some/most people. They are the shallow ones, if I must say. I wrote this entry to remind you that there are bigger problems in this world. Death, poverty, corruption. I could go on and on. I know that emotional baggage is such a heavy one to carry everyday, but it's something you can control as long as you keep your eyes and mind open. For you to lose these things that hurt you, you must be able to understand the nature of your partner, and most of all accept that he/she is as flawed as you are. 

Cheers! 

Another Much Needed Sweet Escape

I'm so happy September's over! Although I want time to slow down since I don't wanna hit November yet, I'm so excited for October! This month will be a very special month for me.

My friends and I have always wanted to go to Boracay altogether but this is the first time it's actually happening in real life. I can't wait to be with them and do such exciting things together. This will be one hell of a ride, I'm sure. I'm still working on my pocket money but I know it'll all be ready once the trip is due. 

As of now, we only have our tickets. Monica told me that we are to book our hotel some time past October 8 so the payment will be on November. I guess that sounds just right. Nevertheless, I won't mind which hotel/inn we're going to stay at. I'm sure we won't be spending time in the room anyways. 

Another thing I have to prepare for is my body. Well, it's October 1; and it's too late to work for that "beach body". I guess I just have to cut down my Starbucks, extra rice, and all unnecessary food intake so I could lose a few pounds before hitting the beach.

Oh my gosh, this entry has been nonsense. Excuse my excitement.

How about you? Any plans for the ber months yet? :)

Questions Towards the End

Created this in Photoshop

How do you really know when you are to end up with someone?

How do you really know when you should stop a relationship that's more of a habit than a real relationship?

Well, I don't have the right to speak for everybody, but I think I can speak for myself. This is a personal entry so it may not be as detailed as it should.

I just came out of a 6-year relationship. I can say that it was both amazing and toxic. If I jump into details, I might be judged and hated by some, even my ex. Let me keep everything simple.

We were friends before we got together. The friendship was good, very good, that you would assume that nothing could go wrong. At least that's what I thought. As years passed, just like in any relationship, we got to know a lot more about each other and I think that's when I can say that I found myself opting out of the relationship.

I am the type of person with a lot of faith. Faith in God and in people. In this public portal of mine, I'd have to say that there were a lot of people who didn't really want to see us together. Yes, and I'm sorry. The people who didn't want to see us together had different reasons and over the years, I tried to fight those reasons - I tried to disregard them because of love. Just as Patty Smith would sing it, "There's a danger in loving somebody too much. It's sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust. There's a reason why people don't stay who they are. Baby sometimes, love just ain't enough." I've been into this song since I was in high school and it never really meant something until I reached the point where everything was falling apart.

Writing this entry took me awhile because I don't want you guys to get the impression that I'm perfect or that I never committed mistakes throughout the six years I was with him. In all honesty, I've made a lot of mistakes. Towards the end, I knew there were a lot of things that I should and shouldn't have done, but I just couldn't find the will to do because I was losing hope. My faith in him has fluctuated and I think this is the first time I didn't want to blame myself.

Well, since this is a private matter, I can't really divulge into details which makes this post rather gibberish, but I'd like to let it out since it's been choking me for over a month now. I also wrote this entry to once again explain myself that I have my reasons and I didn't just "throw everything away". Seriously, not that type of person and you should know that.

Over a Month of Whatever

© Compiled the words on Photoshop

I ended my Nexus career last June 30 and I don't think I've ever felt this relieved. Don't get me wrong, I loved working there for quite some time. I think I just reached the point where I realized that there are other things that I'm good at. Besides, I'm pretty sure they didn't need me there. There are other people who deserve that job more than I do.

So it's been over a month now and the words above are somehow the summary of how I've been. I cannot dig deeper for I won't be able to write sane things. Nevertheless, I think I can consider the past month as one of the most exciting months of my life.

Being unemployed and having weekends as my workdays is not really as easy as I thought it would be. There are really days where I have nothing to do. It's good that we have the fishball cart, but it's not enough. Given all my idle time, I can't really avoid to think about anything and everything. It's like I've been given a free retreat but with no supervision by the priests or nuns or retreat masters.

I once read that looking over your life and reflecting about the things you've done so far is a very important task. We often take a lot of things for granted and don't always notice that we're doing it. After a month of whatever, I feel like I've been blessed with time to actually see the things I've done wrong, see the things I've done right, and understand where I should go. Okay, so don't get me wrong. I fully understand everything that's happening to my life right now, and I even know how to fix some broken parts of it. But just as everybody else, I'm only human. Most people would say I'm strong; but most people don't know how I really feel inside. As a flawed human, I sometimes cannot put into words the thoughts and feelings I have inside. I tend to say things that don't really compliment to what I actually feel, so people can really say that I am strong. I don't really blame them if they think I am. Having said that, let me just remind you of a saying that we all know:

Everything is easier said than done.

Okay, so you can shoot right back at me. You can tell me, "Everything is easier said than done. Wanting something is easy. Saying something is easy. The challenge and the reward are in the doing." -- yes, I am fully aware of that too. But how do we really start the "doing" part?

I came across this very interesting quotation on Google, and allow me to share it to you.

As mentioned above, quote is from GOOGLE but I made this on PS

Then it hit me. Which one of the two has actually happened to you, that you started doing? That you started changing? If you ask me, I won't lie. I would go for number 2; that I've been hurt enough that I have to. If you're curious, yes. I believe I've changed. A lot.

If you know me personally, you would know the change that has occurred in me, but I don't know if you're gonna be happy about it or not. Again, some can say that I've finally become tenacious, some can be proud that I've learned to think about myself, some can say I've changed for the worse, and some can say I've changed into the person I used to hate. There will be a lot of words that will be coming out of different people. There will be a lot of unsupported opinions, but I think I have the right to say that it's  hard when you really haven't gone through the things I have and if you have, we are still different people. I will still insist that things are so much easier said than done. I understand that I may have to face more difficult situations if I don't start/stop, but I believe I still have a lot of discerning to do.

Why?

Why am I really wasting your time right now? Why am I writing this entry? Well, it's simple. If I were to be asked to compare myself to one thing, I'd say I'm crap. Yes, that's right. Shit. Defecation. Not that I'm smelly (oh dear God I hope not. I do not spend a long time in the bathroom cleaning myself just to smell like shit), but because I feel like shit. One day, I'm in someone's life, and then the next day just feel like he/she doesn't need me anymore so he/she decides to just get me out of his/her system. When the time comes that he/she feels very bloated, he/she will come begging for more shit but not really to keep it inside but once again, make him/her feel good. And then there's another side to it. I feel like shit for having treated some people differently just because I am realizing a lot of things.

 

s'il vous plaît aidez-moi savoir la bonne chose
je me sens quelque chose de si bon de faire les mauvaises choses

Hardwork • Passion • Success

Made this with an iPhone app | Quote from Google | Added "Take the damn risk"

Over lunch, I was talking to a friend and our topic was all about life. Both of us shared life experiences and thinking about the things she shared now, I only have one line in my head:

The richest people are not employees.

Yeah, well. To whoever will disagree with me, I would really want to have a debate. Nevertheless, I think we all agree. If you search Google for Entrepreneurship quotes, you will see a quote that says, "60-80% of all new jobs come from small businesses". I will take every opportunity to be able to second the motion. If you come to think of it, starting your own business will not only benefit you - it will benefit those who are less fortunate. A simple small-time restaurant would probably have 10 employees at a minimum. That's 10 heads - 10 families you're feeding. Sure it puts a hell lot of pressure on you, but there is no doubt you're going to feel good about it. Here in the Philippines, a small sari-sari store would have at least one employee/helper. That is again, one head, one family. Although the salary is not as big as those of big companies, that is still considered as income. 

 My friend was telling me about a friend whose parents had to go through a lot just to be able to reach their current status. I'm sorry, but the only line I said was, "well it's a good thing his parents decided to start small-scale businesses rather than "work hard" as employees. I can just imagine what they went through - living days with no earnings, and on other days earning too much. It's really tricky; but they never gave up. It makes my inner goddess jump up and down with joy to know they're really doing well now.

Contrary to what I'm writing, my parents aren't businessmen/entrepreneurs. My dad is a professional, being a dentist. My mom is, well, retired. But she used to be someone big at a certain company. I don't know where this passion came from, but I'm pretty sure it got stronger when I entered college. As stated on my previous entries, I have lived a pretty luxurious life. Given that my parents aren't entrepreneurs at that rate, I can just imagine the life I can give to my children when I focus on the businesses I have in line.

Inspiration

To end this entry, here is a short story/interview of one entrepreneur I'm sure would inspire you in any way possible. Source: Entrepreneur.com

As founder and chief shoe giver at TOMS, a retail company with a mission of social entrepreneurship -- Blake Mycoskie launched his company eight years ago intent on giving back. The premise of TOMS was simple: For every purchased pair of shoes another pair would be donated to children in need in 60 countries all over the world.  

The spirit of this trademarked "One for One" philosophy has informed how TOMS has grown, as the company added eyewear to their repertoire and moved into other ventures.

Last year, TOMS Marketplace was launched -- a digital hub that calls attention to similarly socially-minded companies and gives customers an opportunity to shop with a cause in mind.

And this spring, TOMS got into the coffee business, directly trading with the farmers that grow their beans and giving a week of clean water to the communities that need it most for every bag sold.

We caught up with Mycoskie, an award-winning serial entrepreneur, former Amazing Race competitor and the bestselling author of Start Something That Matters, to talk about always putting the customer first and the importance of following your passion, wherever it takes you.

Q: Knowing what you know now, what would you have done differently when you were first starting up?
A: I would have never decided to enter a business where only a handful of companies or customers can determine your fate.

Q: What do you think would have happened if you had had this knowledge then?
A: I wouldn't have tried to start a cable network [Reality Central in 2003]. I tried to start a reality TV cable network and ultimately failed, because we could not get necessary distribution on the big cable operator platforms.

Q: How do you think young entrepreneurs might benefit from this insight?
A: Even if you have the best idea in the world and tons of customers that want it, if there is a platform, channel, retailer that will get in between you and your customers, you could have a problem. If they love what you are doing, that's great, but if they don't, you have to figure out a way to get directly to the end user with your product and service. 

Q: Besides inventing a time machine, how would you have realized this wisdom sooner?
A: I would have read more business biographies.  The most successful entrepreneurs who write them are transparent about the mistakes they have made and what you can learn from them.

Q: What are you glad you didn’t know then that you know now? Why?
A: How hard it is to start a shoe business. How hard it is to build a business when you are committed to giving something away every time you sell something in a one-for-one manner, and lastly, how many red eye flights you would have to take to save money on hotel rooms!

Q: What is your best advice for aspiring entrepreneurs?
A: Focus on your passion. Nothing else matters.

-This interview was edited for clarity and brevity.

Let me repeat something in big, bold letters:

Focus on your passion. Nothing else matters.

The Big Boss

February 14, 2003

Valentines Day, 6th Grade.

Max, being Kim's legal name, was my mom's Valentines gift to me and my brother. I was 12 (turning 13) and my brother was 13 (turning 14) when he came to our lives. As mawkish as it sounds, I really feel that the song How Did You Know by Gary Valenciano is one of the songs I dedicate to Kim boy. Seriously, how did he know we needed someone like him in our lives? That there were empty spaces in our hearts? He came at the right time in our lives. I'll never forget how he brought the sun to shine in our lives; and took all the worries and fears that we had.

Kim boy is a pure breed German Shepherd. Before we had Kim, we had Pongo (in the Philippines we usually call his breed the "askal" meaning "asong kalye" or street dog. Otherwise, he's a mutt), Pearly (she was an askal given to me by our neighbor who died after 2 mos), Mikey (another askal/mutt who's still with us now but isn't really friends with anyone), and Bambi (a bulldog who stayed with us only for several months). That's four dogs before him, and he beat them in all aspects. Being probably the most expensive breed of the bunch, he really is the smartest. You would usually see German Shepherds as dogs who smell you/your things upon entering a hotel or a mall, go after bad guys, etc. They're really smart, and they're really guard dogs. Real dogs. Given that they're sorta like the soldiers, they have a very loving dog-nality (excuse the term. I was going for personality lol). They are very sweet and very loyal.

Kim boy was both. Very sweet and ferocious. Ferocious to people who don't live at home that is. Sweet, well, duh. His favorite person on earth is my dad cause when he was still a puppy, my dad slept on the floor with him. He would clean up his poop, his urine, feed him, bathe him, and all those things. As a child, I really didn't know how to do those. Second would be all of us. He likes staying with us as we eat, and he would stare at you and giving you the impression that he likes what you're eating. As for me, he knows how I hate having saliva on me so he would always come to me and shove his face all over me and then leave.

When my parents were in the States, I was talking to them on Skype and asked my dad to say, "Kim boy" over the phone. Setting the highest volume, Kim, missing my dad so much, ran around the house trying to find where the voice was coming from. That's how he is. That's how passionate he is. That's how he loves us. Whenever I am home alone, I'd stay at the garage, watch tv, smoke some cigarettes and eat. Knowing that I don't like being home alone because I'm fragile, he would stay beside me, watching the gate. He would guard me like that. He does the same for everyone else.

People who don't have dogs (or any pet) and people who have pets just for show will never understand the pain of losing a dog. Dogs aren't just dogs, they're your friend. They, one way or another, become a part of your family. Just like what my brother said on his Facebook account, "You'll always be someone, not something". Kimboy is not just our pet, our guard, our friend, but also our brother.

Now that we have Alex, we have someone to remind us of Kim. She is also a pure breed German Sherperd. She’s 6 months old and she’s also sweet. My mom didn’t have the intention of getting her, but she was very shocked to see the 98% physical similarity with Kim.

Kim boy, wherever you are, we miss you. Wherever you are, please keep on guarding us. We will always have you in our hearts.